Why knowing Penny Wilcox has made me a better person (In loving memory)

Most of us go through life looking for purpose; hoping that somehow, at the end of the day, we’ve made a difference in some way.  That the people we love know we love them, that the people we don’t know can somehow benefit from us, and that the world is somehow a better place because we were there.

I don’t know if that was Penny’s vision, but it certainly was her achievement.  I, for one, have been changed for the better.

Grandma Penny with four of her biggest fans (the feeling was mutual).

 Penny had an unconditional and fierce love for her family.  They were all perfect in her eyes, deserving of unwavering love and affection...and whatever their hearts desired.  I used to be concerned about her “spoiling” her grandkids and that they weren’t appreciating her gifts.  What I understand now is that her gifts were much bigger than the abundance of toys in the unwrapped bags- her gifts made people feel special.  That is what my kids will remember about Grandma.

Penny had one of the most generous and empathetic hearts I’ve ever seen.  If the kids came to her crying, more often than not they would both end up in tears.  If someone crossed you, Penny would have your back, no matter what.  You knew she was always on your side.

And it wasn’t just family- it was not unusual that she would befriend complete strangers and, if they had a need, she would help them in any way she could.  Or they would just talk for hours- just ask Renee about her namesake.  Penny wore her heart on her sleeve and would give the shirt off her back if the situation called for it.  

Penny has inspired me to be more adventurous with my family for the sake of creating memories. There was more than one occasion when I would begrudgingly agree to an excursion with the kids at Penny’s request because of the burden it placed on me as the parent.  Let’s face it, going anywhere with four young kids is difficult, and more often than not, stressful.  But Penny had the wisdom to know that the temporary stress on me would far outweigh the happy, lifelong memories being created for the kids.  Now those moments are cherished memories that will live long after she’s gone.

And that is why I will be a better mother, wife, parent and person having known Penny.  I learned that sometimes life is less about doing and more about being, and THAT is the kind of legacy I hope I will leave too some day.

With gratitude and in loving memory,
Aimee

"Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans..."

Aint that the truth.  Life has been busy and happening all over the place over the last couple months.  Here is my best catch-up-nutshell version of our crazy life...

We survived yet another tax season.  Are they getting harder or are we just getting older?  Or both?  The good news is that I'm looking forward to that post-labor amnesia that should be kicking in any day now where looking back "it wasn't that bad...".  The GREAT news is that Brian really likes his job.  And, really, life is too short not to. 

Blake earned his yellow belt in karate, way to go, Blake!

Of course now it's getting harder and he hasn't totally committed to practicing, but I'm hoping the hitting and kicking techniques will change his mind (so long as he doesn't practice those on his siblings).  When he's not going kung foo, Blake is putting his new pocket knife to use following his  recent Cub Scouts refresher on whittling.  He's so proud, what do you think of his fish?

Note: whittling a small bar of soap takes a lot of- okay, too much- focus and patience for a group of excited third grade boys.

We also learned how to ski Southern California style- on grass, of course! 

It actually turned out to be a really good team building exercise with Scouts that ended up being very akin to rowing.  And I'm happy to report that Blake seems to finally be doing much better in school...now that it's May.  No doubt he's looking forward to summer and more fort building (he actually builds rooms in his forts!).

Garrett has continued to amaze us with his unique and original Lego creations.

This is the "graveyard" he built complete with headstones, a "creepy" tree, spider web and spider.

Watching Garrett construct this sphinx was pretty amazing- he new exactly what piece needed and where to put it.  He built his in under 5 minutes.

It seems like daily that he comes up with something new.  I can't wait to see what he comes up with at Lego camp this summer...should be interesting.  While I'm still trying to wrap my brain around him turning eight, Garrett has managed to finagle three family birthday celebrations and a friend party next month.  This kid is going to be a millionaire someday...  These days he's added another Character Counts wristband to his collection after being rewarded at school for turning in money he found on the playground.

Does this nullify the Character Violation he got earlier that week? 

Chase is still a bigger version of his sweet and loving self.  He's become quite the talker these days and goes from 0 to frustrated in about .01 seconds...patience is not this child's virtue.  But, fortunately, being too darn cute is.  And so are compassion, affection and cuddling.  Yeah, he's pretty irresistible.  He's also become quite the little dancer/singer.  Here are his moves to Michael Jackson's "Beat It".

Otherwise, his biggest challenge right now is trying to be "one of the 'big' boys" when his body is only three (which doesn't help his frustration).

Ella got her first hair cut!  Yes, while Chase has had more than we can count, we've been holding out on getting Ella's haircut so she could have long hair.  And now that she does, she wants it cut "like a boy".  The compromise was just a trim, which turned out much better than I was anticipating considering that she was growling at the stylist the entire time. 

She even got a style (something I'm strictly prohibited from going).  In the end she walked away with a "Jedi" braid- the one and only time, I'm sure.

She has also become quite enthused with drawing.  Here is the first official drawing that is recognizable to others- can you guess what it is?

It's kind of hard to see, but according to Ella it's a spider.

Now if I could just harness that creativity exclusively to paper... 

And, of course, she is still dressing up (and undressing) Ella-style constantly.  

Here's one of the coolest things about preschool- the twins got to celebrate their "special day" at school, where they celebrate non-school birthdays.  They were super proud to have Aunt Renee come to read a few of their favorite books.

Aimee.  My updates are a little less exciting...I'm still running about 20 miles a week, which is good considering I discovered cake pops (and really wish I hadn't)! 

Other than keeping up with family, I've been working a little less and am promising myself I will make time to write more.  Summer is just around the corner and I'm ready- or at least armed- with workbooks, summer camps and sunscreen.

Easter was low-key this year.  Mostly because we had been too busy to plan much more than an egg hunt and a totally nontraditional (but easy) lasagna dinner.  I really need to talk to the Easter bunny about rescheduling Easter for AFTER tax season.  Just as well- we went light on the egg hunt too, since I had already eaten most of the candy. 

Mother's Day was also low-key (the theme around here when things get crazy).  And, you really can't go wrong with a massage to celebrate.

 

This was the Mother's Day Tea at the twin's preschool where the kids in the class created the menu for the moms.  This year it was chicken noodle soup, lemonade and chocolate ice cream.  Yum? What I love about that is that they are all comfort foods, which tells me the kids love the comfort of mom!

 

Then there was the hailstorm of '12.  We had a few days of cold rain and hail- so much so that it accumulated just enough to make ONE snow/iceball.  By the next weekend it was 80 degrees, so that was our winter and then we were into spring.  It was fun while it lasted.

One of the coolest things about San Diego is "Free Tuesdays" at Balboa Park.  On this day we went with Nana to the Natural History Museum to see the dinosaurs (of course) and then went to the Reuben H. Fleet Science Center where the kids got to explore for hours.  A portion of the upstairs was dedicated to stick building- whatever you can imagine and build!  We all had fun building masterpieces (and learning about physics...).

Over Spring Break the kids and I got to visit with John, Jen, Patrick and Jessica, who we haven't seen in almost eight years!  What a great time (minus the stomach bug that knocked a few of us down), and how fun to be grown ups and reminisce about childhood!  It was especially fun getting to know Patrick and Jessica a little better- what sweet kids (which is strange to call them, since they are both taller than me and twice as big since the last time I saw them).

Speaking of family, we recently had the privilege of hosting a family of House Wrens in the birdhouse the boys made with Grandpa a few years back.  Blake was the first to notice it, but I was doubtful because I thought the hole was too small.  Turns out, it was just the right size for a small bird and perfect shelter for a nest!  

In fact, we've had quite a variety of birds hanging out at our house lately- a Scrub Jay that waits on our patio for bread crumbs, a Coopers Hawk and a Redtail Hawk that consider our yard prime hunting grounds, hummingbirds that keep checking back to see if we've refilled our feeders, and a woodpecker that can be heard and seen poking at the neighbors' trees.  Blake even did his school presentation on birds- and a special thanks to Aunt Nee Nee for helping him!

And in the midst of it all, we moved Penny/Grandma & David/Grandpa in early March to be closer to us.  The move was all that Penny had talked about wanting for years, and we were able to spend a little more time with her in the last month.  Sadly she passed away just a few weeks after moving here (more on that in another post) and we think about and miss her often.

The good news is that this summer is promising to be unforgettable!  The boys are really looking forward to fishing and bird watching with Grandpa, going to Lego, Lasertag and rock climbing camps, and hopefully spending most other days in their bathing suits (literally, not metaphorically, although nothing would surprise me in this house).  Chase & Ella will hopefully be taking swim lessons and tumbling.  And I'm just hoping to keep my sanity :)

Happy Birthday, Garrett!

After reviewing my posts of when Garrett turned five, six and seven, here's what I've concluded about him turning eight:

1.  He loves toys, then family, then animals.  Although junk food may be tied with toys, and that's only when he's not fighting with siblings.  Or when he's not sporting a teenage attitude- then NOTHING makes him happy!  (Which, by the way, is also the reason I don't have very many decent pictures of him lately).

2.  His sense of humor is unique, evolving, and still inappropriate.  Probably more so as he is exposed to more of this crazy world.  Like, who in their right minds ever thought a show called the "Annoying Orange" would be a good idea?  Okay, it's my fault for letting him watch it, but "annoying" does not even begin to describe it.  And he LOVES it!

3.  He is still obsessed with Legos, but it's become a great outlet for his ideas and creativity.  And he's recently taken to sketching. 

4.  He loves to read.  Unless it's homework, then he'll complain about it.  But once it's bedtime, he'll stay up waaaay past his bedtime reading by the crack of light from the bathroom down the hall.  Diary of a Wimpy Kid is his current favorite- and he's picked up quite a bit of pre-teen wisdom (if you can call it that) and humor, and he can't get enough of it.

5.  He's getting even more clever when it comes to getting his way.  I suppose I could view it as his entrepreneurial spirit, but he is very quick to negotiate to get what he wants.  And he never forgets what you agree upon.  Do you think he's a talented artist?  Great!  He wants to sell you a drawing... that's what I mean by clever.

6.  Sometimes he just plain blows me away.  Like when he emptied his change jar- and TWO weeks of allowance money- for the school fund raiser for kids with cancer.  Or, when he created a new system for consequences that he thought would be more effective than our current one.  Or, when he brought home this letter he wrote at school. 

So glad to have this in writing, because sometimes I need written proof!

This is the same kid who has been sent to the principle's office the same week he was "caught" shining and earned a Character Counts Award.  Life with Garrett can be a little unpredictable, but one thing's for sure- it's never boring!

We love you, Garrett!  And we look forward to the adventures to come...